the heartbeat about to stop

I just don’t have the guts to say this to you. I’m hundred per cent sure you will not understand me. Yes, I’m that complicated and you’ll never understand me. It’s the simplest matter ever, but I don’t know why it is so hard, not only for you for both of us.

I though love is easy. I don’t think that way anymore. The older I become, the definition of love for me is too complicated. You can say I’m lost. You can hit me but I kinda believe this theory;

“Love is the hardest thing happens in human life ever”

I still don’t get it why God keep punishing me this way again and again. Ok, I know it’s wrong to put it that way, you know, blaming God. So now, who am I supposed to put the blame on?

I think love is easy but it comes in this way,

You love someone so badly, you’ll lose it all someday. By all I mean, everything!

"You ever love somebody so much you can barely breathe.When you're with them you meet and neither one of you even know what hit 'em.Got that warm fuzzy feeling.Yeah them chills.Used to get 'em. Now you're getting fucking sick of looking at 'em.You swore you've never hit 'em.Never do nothing to hurt 'em.Now you're in each other's face spewing venom and these words when you spit 'em you push pull each other's hair. Scratch, claw, bit 'em throw 'em down" - eminem

All the magical words has gone, because I’m about to lose you…